HOW AN UNMARRIED MUSLIM CAN DEAL WITH SEXUAL DESIRES

HOW TO DEAL WITH SEXUAL DESIRES

BismilLahir Rahmaanir Raheem.
Sexual desire is something that has been created in man by Allah and it cannot be got rid of. Getting rid of it is not something that is required of the Muslim; rather what is required of us is to refrain from using it in haraam ways, and to use it in the ways that Allah has permitted which is after marriage.

The problem of desire in a young woman/Man may be solved by taking two steps.
The first step is to reduce and weaken the things that may provoke desire in a person. This may be achieved in a number of ways, including the following:

1 – Lowering the gaze and refraining from looking at that which Allah has forbidden. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):  “And tell the believing men and women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts)”[al-Noor 24:31]    The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Do not follow one glance with another, for the first is allowed but not the second.” There are many sources of haraam looking, such as looking directly at young men and thinking about their attractive looks, or looking at pictures in magazines and movies of women etc.

2 – Avoiding reading stories and novels which focus on the sexual aspect, and avoiding reading internet websites which deal with such topics.

3 – Keeping away from bad company. Make friends who can only remind you of Allah and His Messenger.

4 – Avoiding thinking about desire as much as possible. Thinking in and of itself is not haraam, but if one thinks about it for too long, that may lead a person to haraam actions.

5 – Spending one's time in useful pursuits, because spare time may lead one to fall into haraam things.

6 – Avoiding as much as possible going to public places where young men and women mix.

7 – If a girl is tested with studying in a mixed environment, and cannot find any alternative, she has to remain modest, serious and dignified, and should avoid sitting with young men and speaking to them as much as possible. She should restrict her relationships to friendships with righteous female classmates.  

May Allah forgive our sins and protect us from all haraam sexual activities. Aameen.

Brother Mohamed Gaffar

10 SIMPLE GOOD DEEDS WITH VERY GREAT REWARDS

1. Sitting After Subuh Salah
"Whomsoever prays Al-Ghadaa (Fajr) in congregation, then sits remembering Allah until sunrise, then prays two rak'ats of Salah has a complete reward of Hajj and Umrah." The Prophet SAW repeated the word 'complete' three times for emphasis. (TIRMIDHI)

2. Praying the Twelve Sunnat Prayers Each Day
"Allah will build a house in Jannah for whomsoever that is diligent in observing 12 Sunnat Rak'ahs (as follows): 4 rak'ahs before and 2 after Dhuhr, 2 after the Maghrib, 2 after 'Ishaa, and 2 before Fajr." (TIRMIDHI)

3. Attending Lectures In The Masjid
"Whomsoever goes to the Masjid not desiring except to learn or to teach what is good - has the reward of a pilgrim who completed his Hajj." (TABRANI)

4. Visiting A Sick Muslim
"There is no Muslim who visits a sick muslim early in the morning but 70 thousand Angels send blessings upon him until evening comes; and if he visits him (i.e. the sick person) in the evening, 70 thousand Angels send blessings upon him until morning comes; and he will have a Garden in Paradise." (TIRMIDHI)

5. Providing Food To Break The Fast
"Whomsoever provides food for breaking the fast of a fasting person - receives the reward of the fasting person, without the reward of the fasting person being reduced in any way." (TIRMIDHI, IBN MAJAH)

6. Standing In Solah On Laylatul Qadr
"Laylatul Qadr is better than a thousand months." (AL-QUR'AN 97:3)
Note: Better than a thousand months means that it is superior than approximately 83 years of worship!

7. Remember Allah When Going Shopping
"Whomsoever enters a market and recites:
'Laa ilaha illallah wahdahu la shareeka lah, lahul mulku wa lahul hamdu yuhyi wa yumeetu wa huwa hayyun laa yamoot, bi yadihil khair, wa huwa ‘ala kulli shayin qadeer...'
(Meaning: 'There is nothing worthy of worship except Allah, alone without partner, to Him belongs dominion and praise, He causes life and feath and He is the Living and does not die. With him is all the good, and He is over all things competent.')
… Allah will write for him / her a million good deeds and erase a million bad deeds and raise him a million levels." (TIRMIDHI)

8. Asking Allah to Forgive Your Muslim Brothers and Sisters
"Whomsoever seeks forgiveness for believing men and believing woman, Allah will write for him a good deed for each believing man and each believing woman." (TABRANI)

9. Recitation of Subhanallah Wabihamdih Morning and Evening
"Whomsoever recites 'Subhanallah Wa Bihamdih' (meaning: 'praise and glory be to Allah') one hundred times (100 x) morning and evening, his sins will be erased even if they are like the foam on the sea." (BUKHARI)

10. Recitation of Subhanallah One Hundred Times
"If a person says 'Subhanallah' (meaning: 'glory be to Allah') one hundred times (100 x) - a thousand (1000) good deeds are recorded for him and a thousand (1000) bad deeds are wiped away. (MUSLIM)

May Allah make these beautiful good deeds easy for us and grant us the great rewards attached. Aamin.
Please share others. May Allah bless you.

BEAUTIFUL STORY OF MALIK IBN DINAR AND THE BURGLAR

A burglar scaled the wall of Maalik Bin Dinar’s house one night and easily managed to get inside. Once inside the house, the thief was disappointed to see nothing worth stealing. Maalik was busy performing prayer. Realizing he was not alone, he quickly ended his prayer and turned around to face the thief. Without showing any signs of shock or scare, Maalik calmly extended greetings of peace and said, “My brother, may Allah forgive you. You entered my home and found nothing worth taking, yet I do not want you to leave without taking away some benefit.”
He went in another room and came back with a jug full of water. He looked into the eyes of the burglar and said, “Make ablution and perform two units of prayer, for if you do so, you will leave my home with a greater treasure than you had initially sought.”
Humbled by Maalik’s manners and words, the thief said, “Yes, that is a generous offer indeed.”
After making ablution and performing two units of prayer, the burglar said, “O Maalik, would you mind if I stayed for a while, for I want to stay to perform two more units of prayer?”
Maalik said, “Stay for whatever amount of prayer Allah decrees for you to perform now.”
The thief ended up spending the entire night at Maalik’s house. He continued to pray until morning. Then Maalik said, “Leave now and be good.”
But instead of leaving, the thief said, “Would you mind if I stayed here with you today, for I have made an intention to fast?” “Stay as long as you wish,” Maalik said.
The burglar ended up staying for a number of days, praying during the late hours of each night and fasting in the day. When he finally decided to leave, the burglar said, “O Maalik, I have made a firm resolve to repent for my sins and for my former way of life.”
Maalik said, “That is in the Hand of Allah.”
The man did mend his ways and began to lead a life of righteousness and obedience to Allah. Later on, he came across another burglar who asked him, “Have you found your treasure yet?”
He replied, “My brother, what I found is Maalik Bin Dinar. I went to steal from him, but it was he who ended up stealing my heart. I have indeed repented to Allah, and I will remain at the door (of His mercy and forgiveness) until I achieve what His obedient, loving slaves have achieved.”

(Al-Mawaa’idh wal-Majaalis: 85)
Adapted from ‘Stories of Repentance’ published by Darussalam

HEALTH TIPS- 5 THINGS NOT TO DO IMMEDIATELY AFTER MEAL

5 THINGS NOT TO DO IMMEDIATELY AFTER MEAL

1. Do Not Have Tea: Whilst tea has its own benefits, when it comes to diffusing cardiovascular diseases, the polyphenols in tea makes it difficult for your body to absorb the iron from your food. The acid content in tea also interferes with the proteins in the food. This is the reason it is recommended not to drink tea immediately after a meal.

2. Do not take a Bath or Shower: To digest your food properly, you need the blood flow to be stimulated towards stomach. Bathing does exactly the opposite. It diverts the blood flow towards your hands and feet. This affects the digestion of the food and can further lead to more health issues. Experts recommend that you wait for around half an hour before you take a shower after having meal.

3. Do Not Sleep: Gravity plays its part here. As soon as you lie down, the digestive juices start flowing away from the stomach, and this can cause intestinal inflammation. This is the reason why people feel a burning sensation in their mouth if they sleep immediately after a heavy meal. By sleeping after eating, you are only putting additional pressure on your diaphragm.

4. Do Not Go For a Walk: Get rid of the age-old belief that walking immediately after the meal helps in better digestion. Walking indeed helps in burning energy but doing it as soon as you finish your meals only leads to acid reflux and prevents digestive juices from absorbing the nutrients of the food.

5. Do Not Eat Fruits: There is no dearth of benefits of fruits for your body. The fact that they contain absorbable sugars makes them ideal to be consumed at any time of the day, except immediately after finishing your meal. Fruits delay the time food takes to reach your intestines. So, avoid them right after a meal. Apart from afore-mentioned points, there are a few more ‘instructions’ flying around. But there is more fiction to them rather than fact. Eat right and live healthy!